Sunday, November 1, 2009

Why Do Butch Women Want to Act Like Men?

Do butch women want to be men? Why would someone want to look like or imitate a man? If I wanted to date a man, I would.

Answer: These are just some of the statements I have heard in reference to butch women.

I find that in the lesbian community there is a lot of ignorance and often intolerance of people who are interested in exploring the more masculine side of themselves.

I am not totally sure where it comes from, but my guess is it stems from internalized homophobia -- people who are concerned with how gays and lesbians look to the outside world. Those same people who have a problem with butch-looking women, also don’t like to see the “flamboyant” gay men represented in the media.

But the truth is, these representations are just part of the diversity of who we are as a LGBT community. As well as the straight community. One of my best friends is a very butch straight woman. (Who gets mistaken for lesbian often, especially when she’s hanging out with me!) She is very aware of how she presents and claims it has to do with being raised on a farm. She could be right, but then again, her sister who was raised on the same farm is very feminine.

I also think it is important to acknowledge that we all have elements of masculine and feminine within us, no matter what our sexual orientation. Just like there is a Kinsey Scale of sexual orientation, which goes across a spectrum, there is a scale of gender expression.

It is my opinion that being butch, femme or somewhere in between is an inborn trait, much like sexual orientation. Personally, I was acting like a tomboy, never liked dresses or dolls, long before I had any inkling of what being a lesbian was. I did not choose to be this way, simply who I was born to be.

Some butches love to work on cars, watch football and do projects around the house. Others do not. Some femmes like to work on cars, watch football and do projects around the house.

Butches are women. They do not want to be men. People who are born women and want to be men are called transsexuals.

Butches are women who feel comfortable expressing the masculine side of themselves.

Question: Do Butch Women Like to Be Touched Sexually?

Answer: The simple and easy answer is there is more than one kind of butch lesbian. Hell the person you saw in the bar may not even identify as butch. You really can’t judge a book by it’s cover.

For some being a butch has to do with how they are in bed. For others it is more how they present themselves to the world or how they feel on the inside. You might look at someone as say, "She's butch" based on how she looks, but she might not identify that way at all.

Some butches are very into the butch/femme dichotomy and are only attracted to other femmes. Others only like to date other butches. Some don't have a preference one way or another


Sasha said...

First, anonymous needs to grow up. Secondly I encounter problems because I don't dress the role, but consider myself fairly masculine. I occasionally smoke cigars, I drink, I curse, I talk about women the same way guys do when the mood strikes me but I don't wear my hair short, with a wife beater and dirty jeans- I still dress like a lady. Skirts dresses stocking and heels.

الـــــدانة said...

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LesbianTomboy said...

هلا والله حياج
welcome :)

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Chaobaby7 said...

I can't help being butch, I have PCOS and grew a tache at 11, never developed a dipped in waist or put weight on my hips and thighs as women are " supposed" to. I am heavy set, stronger than most men and if I wear a dress just look like a man in drag so I wear feminine pants and tunic tops as i just look daft in dresses, I describe myself as a lip stick tom boy, I like pretty things but I am just blokey, I fancy men and women but I have never been girly or into bags and shoes and gossip, always been one of the lads.xx